Love and Marriage
1 Cor. 13
Intro: LOVE! What a word; what a feeling; what an experience; what a vital part of life!
This chapter (1 Cor. 13) is about Love in general; love in all its applications; in all its settings; in all relationships. Certainly it applies to Love in friendships; love in the family circle; love between Brothers and Sisters in the Lord; and it also applies to Love in Marriage.
Paul names 15 specific characteristics of love and they seem to fit rather naturally under four main headings.
I. Love is Patient.
Patience is named first and next to last- “love endures all things.” Love is Very patient.
Also in the list is this: “is not easily provoked...” (No chip on the shoulder; no short fuse) Patience again. So, Love is Very, Very Patient!
“Love beareth all things” (endureth, puts up with) Get the message- Love is Patient!
In patience there is No giving in to anger. To feel it is one thing; to give Vent to it something else. “Well, we don’t mean to fight, but we get irritated and next thing you know, we fly off the handle.” (Is not easily provoked) Patient love does get irritated but does not erupt. Anger and Temper are condemned for all believers in all of life, not just in marriage. If it’s sin at all other times, it’s sin in marriage as well.
A 76 yr old man went in for a routine check up and the doctor found him to be in remarkable condition. The doctor asked him, “What’s your regimen for staying in such good shape?” “Well,” the man replied, “ I’ve been married for over 50 years and when we married we agreed that we would not have any knock down drag out fights. I vowed that anytime I became angry I would go for a walk; that’s why I’m in such good shape.”
Patience rules out Anger but requires Acceptance. We must accept others for who they are; just as they accept us for who we are. Have patience with them; they must have patience with you; For this patience is patience with People, not just circumstances. Love is Patient!
II. Love is Kind.
“Love is kind” (Gracious; Gentle- Gal. 5:22)
“Doth not behave itself unseemly”- rudely; improperly
We often strive to be kind to others in social life; not to be rude in public; kind to total strangers- don’t make fun; don’t interrupt; don’t make snide comments; don’t laugh at mistakes- then too often we do those very things to the person and people we are supposed to love the most- our own spouse and children. Peter- “be courteous” Kind and Considerate.
A poet wrote: I have wept in the night, for shortness of sight, that to somebody’s need made me blind; but I never have yet, felt a twinge of regret, for being too kind.
So Paul said, “Love thinketh no evil” It does not immediately believe the worst; for love is not suspicious or malicious but gracious.
An Important Part of kindness is Appreciation.
Appreciate them as a Person; their Qualities & Abilities.
Appreciate them as a Partner; for their Actions; for what they do. (Especially for you; for your children; for your family)
III. Love is Unselfish.
“Love vaunteth not itself” (does not brag or boast about self)
“Love is not puffed up” (puffed up like a bellows used in the blacksmith’s shop; or like the puffer fish who enlarges to THREE times its normal size!)
“Love envieth not.” (Love is not always boiling with envy; not always wanting something or someone it doesn’t have)
“Love seeketh not her own.”
(Does not expend all its energy on self; does not expect others to expend all their energy on him or her as well)
For Love to be Unselfish Requires Accommodation.
Relationships are not Just TAKE- They are Give and Take. Selfishness will destroy all relationships; Friendships; and certainly a Marriage. Marriage in particular is not a 50/50 proposition; But a 100/100!
That’s Bible my friend!
1 Cor. 7:3 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. 4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
IV. Love is Faithful.
“Love rejoiceth not in inquity but rejoiceth in the truth.” (Does not enjoy sinful things but delights in the truth)
“Love believeth all things.” (Not blind belief of everything and everyone; But a Positive attitude and outlook; believing the best until proven otherwise)
“Love hopeth all things.” (Love is Full of Faith because it rejoices in the Truth)
“Love never faileth.” (Love is never ineffective; it is always productive.)
Like the time God said of his Word: “it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.” So when Love is genuine, it is powerful and effective.
For Love to be Faithful Requires Allegiance:
Allegiance to God; to his Holy Word;
Allegiance to each other. In the words of the Song of Solomon- “I am my beloved’s and he is mine!”
Love is Patient-Acceptance; Love is Kind-Appreciation; Love is Unselfish- Accommodation; Love is Faithful- Allegiance.
Are you practicing this Bible kind of love in Your Marriage?
Bro. Dwain Galiher
Pastor of JHPC